Hash Trophies
There are a number of wearable trophies that are
given out each week at ceremonies for notable activity during that week's trail. Many hashers autograph those awards they win and proudly wear them the next week. However, it is imperative that you never, ever wash them.
Our own Sh!t Nazi (and Hash Paraphernalian) is supposed to keep track of where each of these items are just in case a hasher suddenly discovers that he has a life and never returns. However, the Sh!t Nazi usually seems more interested in keeping track of where the beer is. If you see any of the following, please return them to the Madison Hash House Harriers at the earliest possible run.
A shirt for this week's hare. Just to make it easier to know who to blame.
FRB - Front Running Bastard. Really, it is a social club. So hashers who insist on being out in front desire our scorn.
These cut-off shorts with suspensers really stink.
Whiner - For the person who whines the most that week.
Usually, there are many, many hashers who qualify for the whiner shirt each week.
Next time you open your mouth, why don't you stick a beer in it?
Hash Sh!t - If you are going to be one, you should get to wear one. Doo-doo on a necklace.
JFL - Just F*cking Lost. Or maybe you are just stoopid.
This shirt is neon yellow with reflective tape. You'll probably still get lost,
but at least we will be able to find you.
Doggy Style - Woof! A hat in honor of Nut Crackher who now resides in TexAss.
His favorite expression was "Doggy Style!"
F*ck Me Like you Mean it - On second thought, just do me, I don't care.
Condom sown on to the front of the shirt just in case.
What would you do if you were gay? - Everybody looks like an asshole to me.
In honor of Diego Faygo, The Gay Porn Star.
El Gordo - Only awarded to harriettes, this huge gourd symbolizes what they are looking for in their men.
For some reason, it only shows up every three months or so.
DFL - Dead F*cking Last - No award. You're lucky that there is any beer left.
There are a number of other awards often given out that have their own stigma without having make you wear something.
Shortcutter - These people try to outsmart the hare and shorten the actual distance travelled but usually end up JFL.
RD lookalike - If things weren't bad enough...
Wretched Excess - Given to people who maybe actually did something athletic that day instead of just rolling around in a drunken stupor.
Auto hashing - People who refuse to even jog a few miles to get a beer.
