Madison Hash House Harriers

September 20, 2008

HASH HISTORY - HASH RUN #1623 - Annual Jazz Run

The Hare's tail: I learned something very important from our last live hare run, in which UNDERTOKER was the live hare. I learned not do like he did, i.e. don't set off as a live hare and then hide in the bushes until the walkers catch you. Whatever was he thinking? So I just ran my trail till I got back. But I could have walked the whole thing. Hashers, apparently are even easier to distract than I thought. I set one simple blockade and it fooled them for 5 or 10 minutes. All I did was place a simple plywood board across the hole in the fence and attach it with a bungee cord. But they couldn't/wouldn't remove the board, go through and follow the trail. Also, there was a hard-to-find back check. This held them longer than I dreamed was possible. I marked the back check point with a set of 3 dollops and finally the whole group found the true trail. I got all the way home, hopped on my bike and returned to the runners to boast and hurry them along. I barely got them back in time for the live jazz band gig.

What really happened SHOW ME started her annual jazz run in the usual location from the little league parking lot off North Street, but with a twist. She announced she would do the trail as a live hare. Just a small group showed up on a nice afternoon for this adventure including new boots Just Karin who knows UNDERTOKER, Just Matt and Just Melissa who are friends with hashers from Beirut, now living in Madison, LIKE A VIRGIN and PRIESTLY PERVERSION. There was beer at the start and things got underway a little late as SHOW MEstarted to explain the marks. All was going well until she discussed a rather complicated looking mark with a big X through it and another mark next to it. The "live hare" explained that this mark meant she had made a mistake so don't follow this trail. It took a while, but you could see the smoke coming from several hasher ears as they thought about that. Finally POUND 69 and RTG said in unison, "Hey does that mean you preset part of trail?" Like a good politician, the hare changed the subject. After setting a kitchen timer for 10 minutes, the hare took off and told the pack to wait until the timer went off. Since there was beer, no one seemed particularly interested in cheating so everyone waited. When the time came to launch, everyone headed to the usual Jazz Run trail through the "hole in the fence" and onto the bike path. They were stopped dead when they discovered the hole in the fence was covered by plywood. Several hashers looked around for another opening in the fence but then just about everyone admitted they were so intent on watching the timer that they didn't see which way the hare went. Eventually DIEGO figured out that the plywood was attached with a bungee chord that could be removed. After a bit of reverse engineering, the pack was through the fence and onto a long false back into the neighborhood. The true trail headed across Aberg Avenue and onto the bike trail where the FRBs OLLIE THE DOG and BABY BALLS found the first beer check in the shiggy. No one seemed to notice that the live hare was setting trail in plain site a mere 100 yards away at the time. From this point the trail headed to a second alcohol check in the woods consisting of some really bad "Imitation Papaya Liqueur" that was rather quickly rejected. There were several marks heading in several directions and it took the pack a while to find the true trail continuing on the bike trail almost to Anderson Street before ending with a back check. The pack spread out searching the many possible routes and had to be called back, way back, to the true trail heading onto the golf course cart trails. The route eventually crossed the golf course and led to another beer check behind Shopko. On the way there the hare appeared on her bicycle taunting the pack that she had finished the trail and returned to see what was taking so long. The pack split apart after the beer check with some heading directly back and others finishing the trail and finding the final alcohol check consisting of another imitation liqueur. The On-On was back at the Jazz Garage where the hare served the traditional Chili Mole and plenty of Point beer. The five piece jazz band showed up and the music was underway as a few more hashers showed up. When the band took a break, ceremonies were conducted and all the usual suspects were given their due. The band played for another hour or so before leaving and a few hashers sat around drinking beer well into the evening. There's just something about sitting around a garage drinking beer on one of the final nice summer evenings...