Madison Hash House Harriers

October 4, 2008

HASH HISTORY - HASH RUN #1625 - Football/Postponement RUN

About 20 hashers showed up for RTG's run that started at the campus end of State Street Mall. His original co-hare, PACK HER ASS was a no show, so Just Virginia (LIKES IT LONG???) was pressed into service. This was scheduled to take place at the same time as the Badger game against Ohio State so the traffic was impossible and parking even more so. A few hashers just gave up when they couldn't get near the start area. This part of the mall is also under construction, so even if you could drive nearby and park, you almost couldn't get there from here. There were a significant number of new boots in the crowd and seldom seens TURN IN HAND, BED RIDDEN and CLITIGATOR along with the return of LIKE A VIRGIN and PROFESSOR PERVERSION and visitors IT'S TOO SOFT from Chicago and SPHINCHTER GREASE from Waukesha. After an extended wait at the start, the pack took off and almost immediately split into turkey and eagle routes. ZAMBONER and KRACKASHOWA lead the eagle pack on a route that went part way up Bascom Hill before veering onto the lakeshore path and out to an eagle trail beer check at the ironically named Eagle Point, just past Picnic Point. The turkey trail feigned up Bascom Hill but actually paralleled University Avenue before heading south toward Union South and Camp Randall. KAHUNA ran barefoot as he and AH SHIT took the lead of this pack. As they got past Camp Randall the trail was effectively lost in the waves of 80,000 Badger fans heading in the opposite direction. Co-hare Just Virginia had to provide verbal trail marks to get through this and somewhere at this point AH became JFL. NUTFARMER filled in the gap as he and KAHUNA found the true trail among many falses. They eventually found the turkey beer check in a parking lot near St. James Catholic Church... well actually it was the St. James parking lot that is rented for football traffic. It was full of extreme tailgating fans with fan-tastic layouts of food and beverages. One group took pity on the hashers and offered brats, various hors d'oeuvres and pumpkin cake. The brats were hand made by one of the tailgaters who is from the Weber meat locker family. (For journalistic purposes, this reporter felt compelled to try just about everything.) The brats were fan-tastic!!! Everything was. We told them we would be back every Saturday. Did I mention beer? One of the new boots is associated with a beer distributor so the hares had a selection of unusual beers from that distributor. (Again, for journalistic purposes, this reporter tried them all. The Amber Ale was best.) To top all of this off, a young man approached KAHUNA and NUT and asked if they were competitors in the Ironman. Neither could answer though, since each had a mouth full of bratwurst, so they were left to shake their heads in the affirmative. The turkey and eagle trails converged at a final beer check at a fraternity house next to Camp Randall Stadium and miraculously the beer was still in the coolers. (They just don't make fraternities like they used to.) From there it was back to the start in the dark, and to the On-On at the Pub on State Street to watch the Badger game and the Brewers on side-by-side TVs. The hares had a great buffet of meat and veggie chili, all the fixings and cookies for desert. (reporter tried everything yadda, yadda, yadda...) Ceremonies were conducted during half time and everyone was well rewarded for their deeds including the Brewers who won their game. No such luck for the Badgers though, who lost on a late field goal by Ohio State.