Madison Hash House Harriers

January 10, 2009

HASH HISTORY - HASH RUN #1639

SLOW HAND, RIDES and MS 'D ERECTION started their run on the North side of Oregon, almost, but not quite in the middle of nowhere. It was a cold start for the 17 hashers who gathered to enjoy a beer and shots of ethylene glycol to stay warm before the run. The trail headed southish from the start before heading cross country through calf deep snow. A few runners caught on that the walkers had an easier route and they came back to follow. These separate groups met up further on the route and followed a long winding bike trail that led to more urban shiggy and deep snow where RONALD MACBITCH found some frozen roadkill. This led to a suburban area where the pack found a beer check in the garage of MS 'D ERECTION's female "friend" who had the good sense to be absent while the hash was there. This was no ordinary beer check in that the hares also served Dr. MaGillicuddy Schnapps and left over new years eve Champaign along with the beer. There was tremendous momentum to stay in the garage but eventually, nearly everyone stumbled back onto the trail that traversed more suburban streets and headed onto an elevated railroad bed buried in snow. After a considerable slog on the tracks the pack was once again split into several groups as the route went onto the streets through downtown and back to the start. Throughout the run there was a recurring theme of COL MUSTARD getting lost, but it never really seemed to happen since ICUF kept him in line. The On-On was at the SLOW RIDES place in the country where there was plenty of fine beer on tap and some great food including stroganoff and raspberry foamy Jell-O. There's always a great deal of merriment at the SLOW RIDE on-ons and this was no exception when a significant number of hashers showed up after skipping the run. A small crowd watched football playoffs as another group filled the sauna while others enjoyed just sitting close to the back porch taproom. Nearly everyone was recognized during ceremonies with a down-down of Hamms beer in a can. Highlights included the hares, SLOW HAND's birthday, and new boot Just Meagan who was made to cum by her friend who e-mailed the hash to find out what it was all about. The real highlight though, was COL MUSTARD's first person tale about what happens when your spouse, the emergency nurse, superglues one of your nuts to your thigh. The story was immediately memorialized in an epic hash song to the tune of the balls song, "The COL Glued His Ball to His Thigh." A warning disclaimer was proposed as a result of this story but it was rejected as being too specific to the COL.